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Up shot the hand of anxious Virgo Charlie, a worried frown on his face.
"Teacher," he said, very respectfully and politely, "you are wrong. A straight line is not necessarily the shortest distance between two points." The teacher flushed, visibly annoyed. "Really?" she asked the eleven-year-old, Mercury-ruled youngster. "Would you like to step up to the blackboard and explain how you can dispute such a basic theory of mathematics?" Virgo Charlie trotted immediately to the blackboard, picked up the chalk and demonstrated the proof of his statement, as the entire class rocked with laughter and the teacher's face turned bright red. His demonstration looked somewhat like this:
"You see, Teacher," Virgo Charlie said courteously, after the laughter had died down, "that line appears to me like it could run all the way to China if it wanted, and golly knows how much further than that if it was goin' straight up, instead of around. So, how could a straight line be the shorter distance between two points?"
The teacher, had, of course, neglected to take the horizontal-vertical aspect of her example into consideration. And she had also goofed on her terminology, using the word 'between,' instead of saying ' the shortest distance connecting two point.' It's a common mistake of educators, even erudite math instructors. But Virgo Charles Edison Cameron, through a brilliant and blessed 'breakthrough' invention of his which will be of even more importance to the world than the discovery of his namesake - so remember his name.
If Taurus and Virgo should ever decide to write a book together, the Bull will see to it that the plot is substantial. Virgo will supply the dialogue, correct the spelling and grammatical errors, punctuation and other mistakes. Taurus will then add some rich humour, market it wisely, and make sure it earns money. Sometimes people think Virgos are too timid and self-effacing, too courteous to be so super-critical. To these people, I submit a letter I received in 1970, shortly after the publication of my first book, Sun Signs. It reads as follows, verbatim:
Dear Ms. Goodman… I find on page seventy-eight, line one, in the paperback edition of your book, Sun Signs, a mistake. I quote from the book the phrase: "the sandal clad people of Chaldea…" The phrase should read, "the sandal shod people." Otherwise, you give the reader the impression that the Chaldean people wore sandals, and nothing else. Sincerely, Janine Hartman. P.S. I am a Virgo.
I wish to take this opportunity to thank Janine. As for my other readers, please permit me to correct here and now the impression I may have given to modest Virgins, conventional Taureans and the like, that the people of Chaldea all ran around naked, except for their footwear. My normally ultra-cautious and super-bright Sun Sign editor, Capricorn Bobbs Pinkerton, is properly chastised also. (A Ram may be excused for such carelessness, but never a Goat!) Isn't it fortunate that Janine added her P.S.? I would never have been able to guess her Sun Sign if she hadn't.
If there are any major publishing bonuses on the East or West Coast who are looking for a terrific copy editor, might I suggest they hire Janine? I'm sorry to say that in typical careless Aries fashion, I've mislaid the envelope with her address. But I feel certain I'll hear from her again, when she reads the Virgo-Virgo chapter of this book, and this time, I promise to hang on to her address. I think she's neat! My present scholarly Taurus editor, Sr. Charles Musès, agrees - firmly, of course.
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