timed to the lightning flashes of Uranus, and I really don't know of anyone, including Tom Edison, Ben Franklin and Nicola Tesla, who ever found a way to predict lightning flashes with enough accuracy to log them in a ledger.  One minute the sky is clear-blue milk glass, and a split second later, there's this zigzag streak of fork yellow fire cutting through the clouds, followed by the most awful rumble, then a sudden noise clap of thunder.  Consequently, as intricate as the Lunar Ledger accounting may be, the Uranus Lightning Ledger accounting is simply impossible to keep straight.  Actually, I believe the less traumatic way would be for the Crab and the Water Bearer to play it by ear.  I mean, taking everything into consideration, you know?  By now, you've probably comprehended that his association, while it can no doubt be puzzling for both people, is highly unlikely to be boring either. 

Perhaps because the Crabs are such great reactors, their emotional needs capable of leaping to such heights and plunging to such depths, Aquarius thinks it's fun to play little tricks on them, to surprise them when they're least expecting it.  The Water Bearers may pull their surprise numbers on Cancerians at any age, beginning quite young, sometimes even before they're born - although, typically Uranus-like, they nearly always give a subtle hint of he coming caper, which the Crab almost never picks up but which makes the Aquarians feel better because, after all, they did try to warn you, and you paid no attention.  (Aquarians hate to do anything dishonest or hypocritical.) 

For example, Jennifer H. Smith was about to become a mother for the very first time in March of 1978, in San Diego.  Jennifer is a Cancerian Moon Maid, so you can well imagine the event was enthusiastically anticipated, Cancer being the sign of motherhood, and having babies naturally being the big thing it is to women, but especially to girl Crabs.  The obstetrician informed Jennifer and her husband, Bill, that the baby would arrive on March 28.  Mothers always believe their obstetricians (Cancerian mothers even more because they tend to be shy, and not apt to talk back), although one wonders why they're so gullible, since doctors calculate the date of birth correctly roughly only somewhere below 2 percent of the time, and their batting average is even lower than that on the first baby. 

So here they were, poor Jennifer and Bill, expecting an Aries infant, which of course meant preparing for substantially more screaming demands for clean panties and warm bottles at odd hours during the night because, although all infants are demanding to a degree, Aries infants are selfish beyond belief when it comes to not caring whether their parents sleep or not until their howling needs are fulfilled.  They are feisty little bundles from Heaven, the ones who arrive by way of Mars, but irresistible all the same. 

The problem was that the doctor and the parents were figuring the wrong Sun Sign.  Only the baby himself was aware that he was an Aquarian.  He tried to warn them before he pulled his surprise, but no, they paid no attention and insisted on checking with the doctor and calendars and such, instead of with the San Diego Public Library, where the truth waited for them.  Now, you may think the public library a very odd place to go to learn the date of birth of an expected infant, but to an Aquarian, it's all quite logical. 

Water Bearer Bobby Smith arrived, not on March 28, but precisely on his own Uranus schedule, of February 3, 1978, nearly two months early, and weighing it at 5 pounds, 6 ounces - and no, little Bobby was not a premature baby.  He was a perfectly healthy and well-formed (if tiny) full-term infant, who had no intention of timing his entrance into this world to suit anyone's mistaken calculations, and thereby depriving himself of his Aquarian Sun Sign. 

But as I said, Aquarian Bobby tried to warn his Cancerian mother.  On her hurried departure from the house, on the way to the hospital - when it became evident that, calendar or no calendar, doctor or no doctor, Bobby was definitely arriving - Jennifer passed the hall table, on which lay a library book, with the cover open.  But did she see it?  No.  It wasn't until

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